Happy Thanksgiving

images-7 Today, especially this year, with all the turmoil in the world, we should all count the blessings God has given to us and be grateful for the time we have with our family and friends.

From the Cow Pasture, I wish for you a day filled with laughter, love and blessings.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I’d love to hear your comments. Talk to me. Tell me your story. And as always, you can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood, PinterestBloglovinTwitter@sheilagood, and Contently.

I Bit the Apple

I feel a little like Eve. I bit the Apple, tasted the forbidden fruit. Yep, my eyes opened, and I threw the inferior Windows out, well the window. Unfortunately, once you’ve taken a bite, there’s no turning back. Now, I’m ruined and so is, unfortunately, my Apple.

Seems one can screw up an Apple in a heartbeat while reading recipes, cooking, and imbibing in a taste or two, of wine. Apparently, Apples detest getting wet, even a tiny splatter. In fact, they throw a fit, opening the very application you never knew you had and will even attempt to send emails on your behalf. Unruly is an understatement. I lost all control.

After a trip to the Apple doctor, I was given good news and bad news. The bad, my Apple had succumbed. “The sauce did it,” the cute little technician said. I didn’t ask which sauce. My mind was already taking a pantry inventory, God let there be wine. He continued, “The good news is we can bring it back to life.”

I swallowed. “How much?”

“We’ll send it off, and a week to ten days, it will be like new. Only $800.00,” he said, smiling.

I blanched then my eye caught the gleam of the table to my left. Bright, new shiny Apples flashed on display, and I swear I heard a whisper, “Wanna bite?”

I’d love to hear your comments. Talk to me. Tell me your story. I’m all ears and look for me on Facebook at SheilaMGood, Pinterest, Bloglovin, Twitter@sheilamgood, Contently, and Instagram. You can follow my reviews on Amazon and Goodreads.

 

Black Thursday

I am happy to admit, my Christmas shopping is done and every gift wrapped! I know, some of you are envious, others think I’m a bit type A (maybe a little). But here is the truth. I can’t stand Black Friday, oh wait I meant Black Thursday! Yep, our generous retailers are doing us a favor – moving Black Friday to Thursday, Thanksgiving night no less. The one day families like to gather and show thanks for all life has brought, is this year turning into a race for the bargain. To hell with giving thanks. I’ll be thankful after I elbow my way to that great savings deal on the shelf.  It’s a scam.

According to Tiffany Hsu of the LA Times, “The weekend is crowded with misleading promotions, including deceptive discounts off misstated “original” prices and deals that could have been had a year earlier, according to NerdWallet.”

 And Suzanne Kapner of The Wall Street Journal explains it well in her article, The Dirty Secret of Black Friday Discounts

We, dear consumers have been duped. I’ve been backing away from Black Friday for several years but when it became Black Thursday, I said, “Enough.”  I know some will say, “I love it. I get up at 3:00 am and it’s a blast, puts me in the Christmas spirit.”

  Yeah…if one considers obnoxious, belligerent, elbowing, rude-ass people fighting over toys or parking spaces a mood setter for Christmas. More power to you.

Me? I shall be kicking my heels up on the ottoman, in front of a fire, and enjoying a hot hottie or two.

Oh, might I suggest you wear extra padding, those elbows get pretty sharp.

Bloopers, Typos and Laughter

We’ve all heard the warning, check and double-check spelling, punctuation, and grammar before submitting a piece for publication, but … what can I say, mistakes happen to the best of us. 

If you’ve made a mistake recently, relax. Laughing at one’s self is a sign of maturity, or in some cases, getting ahead of the other guy.

"If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you." 
Groucho Marx                                                                         CLICK TO TWEET
"Laugh, and the world laughs with you; Weep, and you weep alone..."
―Ella Wheeler Wilcox                                                      CLICK TO TWEET

So, kick back and have a good, old-fashioned belly laugh. It’s good for your health and good for the soul. As demonstrated by these wonderful church ladies with typewriters

I can’t take credit for finding these tidbits of laughter. I received them from a dear friend. I tried my to find their origination but was unsuccessful. I did manage to locate them in numerous other places on the net. Angelfire.com,  Beliefnet.comLotsofjokes.com, to name a few.

These Bloopers and Typos actually appeared in church bulletins or announced during church services.

    1. The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
    2. The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’
    3. The sermon tonight: ‘Searching for Jesus.’
    4. Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
    5. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community.
    6. Smile at someone who is hard to love.
    7. Say ‘Hell’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
    8. Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
    9. Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
    10. For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
    11. Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
    12. Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
    13. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir practice.
    14. Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
    15. The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment, and gracious hostility.
    16. Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.
    17. The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
    18. This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
    19. Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.
    20. The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
    21. Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
    22. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
    23. The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new campaign slogan last Sunday: I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours!

Thanks to my friend Jo and all her friends for forwarding these on. I hoped you enjoyed them as much as I did and took them in the spirit they were intended, a good belly laugh and a gentle reminder – check and recheck. Typos happen to the brightest and the blessed of us. No pun intended.

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