Opinion/Musings

It isn’t news to anyone, the last year and a half has been trying, isolating, confusing, and damn right depressing. We’ve had to acquiesce, adjust, change … whatever – pick a verb – to a different way of life.

I’m not here to discuss the pros, cons, or any of the contradictions, theories, or suppositions about where we all now find ourselves, but to talk about a few observations.

People are crying out for connections.

It’s funny after turning into a society that has forgotten how to read facial expressions and largely communicates through text & emojis, we find ourselves craving to see each other and have a real conversation.

The masks, whatever you believe about their merits have robbed us of the very things we took for granted. They obscure the most important part of us in which we communicate – our facial expressions, a smile, a grimace, a frown, or a look of pleasure.

Suddenly, I find myself focusing on the eyes – the window to the soul as they say. I listen harder because words are muffled behind masks. I watch for a furrowed brow, brimming, squinted, or narrowed eyes. I listen to the tone of their voice. Is it pitched, low, loving, angered, or just tired?

I’ve become an active listener. We all have out of necessity.

On occasion, I meet someone without a mask. I don’t rush to judgment or ask about their vaccination status. I’m not afraid but thrilled to see a face and 99% of the time, a smiling face, eager to converse greets me back. I smile and speak and they respond. There’s an openness, a hunger to connect and we do.

It doesn’t matter if it’s a stranger in an elevator, on the street, in a store, or a nail salon – I feel an immediate connection. Sometimes, it’s brief and sometimes it stretches into minutes or hours. It’s as if neither of us wants it to end. It’s been so long, but we’re paying attention now. We’re looking for those opportunities. We’re really listening; not twiddling with our phones, or distracted. We’re hanging on to that moment of human-to-human connection as if by a thread.

These are difficult times, but we need each other. We need to connect, look each other in the eye, focus on the words we exchange, the stories we share, and cherish every connection.

We are not each other’s adversaries. We don’t all march to the same tune, but we are all the same and our connections make the world a better place.

We’re all in this together. Don’t ride it out in fear or alone. You’re not alone. We’re all right here, ready and eager to make connections.

’d love to hear your comments. Talk to me. Tell me your story. I’m all ears and look for me on Facebook Page at SheilaMcIntyreGood, Pinterest, Bloglovin, Twitter@sheilamgood, Contently, and Instagram. You can follow my reviews on Amazon and Goodreads.

Hello, fellow fence jumpers! It has been close to a year since I last stepped deep into the Cow Pasture. Like many of you have been caught up in the strange world of Covid-19, the quarantines, rules, regs, and controversies. It feels as if I have stepped from my world onto another planet.

Uncertainty, fear, isolation, social unrest, censorship, confusion, and even a cultural war have dominated the past year. All of which, looking through a writer’s eye, would make a great start to a sci-fi novel.

So, I sat back and thought about what was happening. The first thing I noticed was how superficial we had become.

Fear does strange things to people. It makes some of us vulnerable, some of us dig down and find our courage and push through, and others become opportunists. The vulnerable retreat to safety to wait out the worst; the courageous push forward and find ways through the challenges, and the opportunistic exploit and take advantage of the situation. It is the opportunists narrative we hear the loudest. And as a result, we stop listening, talking, or hearing each other. We hunker down in homes, groups, or “tribes,” throw ourselves into survival mode, and all the while our world vision narrows to the point we could no longer see others. Really see them.

We have become a nation of paper cut-out people, flat characters who define each other by our most basic and outward traits. Most notably, the color of our skin, political affiliation, or the values we espouse. But, as writers, we know that people are not flat. They are not just a color of skin, or a profession, or gender, or any of those outward characteristics, traits, or appearance.

When writers begin the process of character development outward, physical characteristics such as height, weight, gender, hair/eye color, dress, and so on are the things that we build upon to create living characters. But at that point, all we have is a paper cut out, a sketch. It is by no means the sum of the personality we are developing. We research, plot, plan, and delve into the revealing, intricacies, and intimate details that make our character a person. We want to know what makes them tick, why and how they make decisions, what influences them, or what makes the character act or curl up in a ball. We want to know their biases, preferences, desires, hopes, dreams, deep dark secrets, and the history of their failures. Those things make our character come to life, leap off the pages of our story, and relatable.

Despite all the challenges we’ve faced in the past year, it became clear to me what we need to do. First, we should never give in to the temptation to see others through the lens of what they look like or what group they belong. Each of us is a whole, complex person, made up of our unique life experiences. You can’t tell that by looking at someone from the outside. Two, we should always refuse to accept the narrative of superficial labels. Three, make it a mission to get to know people.

We live in a beautiful free country where every individual deserves respect and to be seen as a whole person. A character of their own making and the way they look is just the beginning. They have a history, an intimate story to tell, complexities unseen by our eyes. But when we take the time to speak to each other, to talk, and to listen, to really listen, we often discover a friend.

As writers, we always strive to be better writers. As one of the millions of characters in this big beautiful world we inhabit together, we should expect nothing less of ourselves than to strive to be a better person. Look beyond watch you see. Dig deeper, reach out your hand and make a new friend. After all, we’re in this together.

How Do Your Characters Move?

Where Do Your Characters Come From?

I’d love to hear your comments. Talk to me. Tell me your story. I’m all ears and look for me on my Facebook Pageat SheilaMcIntyreGood,Pinterest, Bloglovin, Twitter@sheilamgood, Contently, and Instagram. You can follow my reviews on Amazon and Goodreads.