Theorem 31

August 30, 2017August 30, 2017 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / 4 Comments

Although I would never call myself a poet under any circumstances, I can’t imagine a girl alive that didn’t at some point try her hand at writing poetry. Usually, and I’m guessing (wink, wink) every girl has poured her young heart out in rhyme and unreasonableness. I’m sure my cow pasture journal was filled with sappy attempts. I don’t have the remnants of those but I do have one special poem, written while in high school with an amusing little back story.

I would rather have been tied to a stake and set afire than forced to take algebra. However, back in the day (don’t ask, it was a long time ago), if you wanted to go to college, you took algebra. My teacher was a young man fresh out of college and for some reason took a special interest in this struggling student. In fact, had I accepted a dinner date with him (sworn to secrecy, of course) I could have come out with an A. I turned his generous invitation down and instead wrote a poem, which he rather liked. I’d take my chances on the grade.

Theorem 31

Oh, that teacher in 1st period
his Theorems and his Proofs!
the more I try, the harder it gets
and, the Lord knows that’s the truth

The corollaries and postulates,
know them one by one
now, get to work and state the Proof
Of Theorem 31

I proudly state the given
then comes L1=L2
man, on my way, am I
and AB=BY.

I look again at what
I am proud to prove and
suddenly see despair

I know that Mr. Morgan’s near
I sense him in the air.
He’s standing there right over me
With ruler in his hand

Sheila that’s wrong,
dear heart
Erase it and try again

Oh, that teacher in 1st period
his Theorems and his Proofs
they’re driving me up the wall
and, God knows that’s the truth.

With a long, deep
and sad, sad sigh
I begin to erase it
I begin to cry

The shreds of hair lay
All around
My tear-stained face
Is streaked

So here, go again
compose yourself
don’t look so stunned

Sheila, it’s really very easy
now, take this sheet
Quit pulling your hair
now, prove Theorem 31

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject. Join the conversation. Talk to me or tell me your story. I’m all ears.

I’m No Tolstoy

August 29, 2017 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / 9 Comments

As a fan and user of the software Grammarly, I look forward to receiving my weekly progress report. It’s like being in high school again. I’m not graded, thank God, but the report does provide insight and includes my longest writing streak, productivity, accuracy, vocabulary, and top three writing mistakes.

Can you guess the mistake that always appears? You got it! The first time the comma isn’t listed – we’ll celebrate with virtual champagne! Okay, not sure how that would work, but I’ll toast you while I enjoy a glass or two.

This week’s progress report noted I was 97% more productive than other writers. I read that twice, 97 %? My first thought was, who’s using my account? And, the second thought was, where’s the evidence? Cause damned if I can find all that productivity.

Then they gave me this little nugget. 7 weeks of active writing? Tolstoy? War and Peace? Somebody was sipping the bottle.

Regardless, it was inspiring. You, my friends, my fellow fence jumpers, may be reading a post from the next Tolstoy! Or, not.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject. Join the conversation. Talk to me or tell me your story. I’m all ears.

Such an Old-Fashioned Word

August 27, 2017August 27, 2017 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / 8 Comments

Homage

Aw, such an old-fashioned word. Homage – a noun; defined as – respect, honor, reverence, worship, admiration, esteem, adulation, tribute, acknowledgment, recognition, and accolade; memorial services are an example. It’s a word we rarely if ever hear in our daily conversation and certainly rarely see exercised, at least the way I remember.

When I was growing up, certain values and behaviors were expected. It was the norm to honor our elders, parents, teachers, police, fireman, pastors, and most especially our leaders.

Our parents taught us to respect the individuals serving in these roles for the extraordinary contribution each one made to make our lives better, be it a home, education, or nation where we could grow and prosper. Today, it would appear those receiving recognition are the least deserving.

Sadly, paying homage is not only an old-fashioned word but an antiquated practice trampled beneath the feet of political correctness; our loss for sure.

“The Greatest Homage We Can Pay Truth is to Use it.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson – Click to Tweet

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject. Join the conversation. Talk to me or tell me your story. I’m all ears.

Mayhem in the Cow Pasture

August 24, 2017August 24, 2017 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / 18 Comments

Stock Up/ Picjumbo

Okay, maybe the title is a bit melodramatic, but then it seems appropriate given the craziness everywhere else. Anywhoo, that’s another topic for another day; let’s move on.

No the mayhem to which I refer is all on my WordPress blog. You may have noticed over the last couple of weeks, some changes taking place in the Cow Pasture. Here’s why and what’s been happening. I’m sharing this because if you have a WordPress blog, you may be seeing some of the same behavior or glitches.

Have you noticed any of the following?

Your blog pages loading slowly.
Blog freezing when you’re trying to post.
Page insight analysis shows a drop in speed. This tool, it identifies ways to make your site faster and more mobile-friendly.
Strange strings of code showing up in your blog posts.

At first, I thought it might be my computer. So, I did all the appropriate checks – no malware, no viruses, nothing from my MAC seemed to be causing this. The biggest and most mysterious issue I discovered, were pages of code attached to my blog postings. Here’s a portion of the code (usually at least two pages long) and what it looks like. Rest assured this is a photo copy of the code.

I notified WordPress Support, and we’ve been on the hunt for the cause for weeks. In the meantime, their recommendation was for me to go through 520+ posts and delete the strange string of code, manually! For the love of God! Seriously?

So, that’s what I’ve been doing. It’s a time sucking demon and here’s the catch. On occasions, it reappears after I’ve deleted it. Can you say, lost in a circle of hell? So, for whatever reason, revisions it appears (whether a word or paragraph) can trigger this code. It has taken at least 3-4 engineers from WordPress working with me to try to figure this out. I’m not sure we have, but among the causes so far (we think) include:

links
Revisions
And, in particular, images from Pinterest.

A definitive cause has not been discovered. So, for the time being, I’m on a scavenger hunt looking for this damnable code that’s hiding in plain sight in over 520+ posts, pages, and images.

Other issues have been identified Page Insights, as well. Which explains each problem and how to fix it. However, this creates, even more, confusion for me. 1) it all looks like jibberish; as do the instructions, and 2) WordPress does not give us the option to add plugins (which might be helpful) unless you’re at the business level. As a result, WordPress has told me they’re responsible for correcting this stuff. Really? These are typically the issues Page Insights will identify.

I can’t tell you how much time I’ve spent going through my blog making sure every image is optimized, compressed, and deleting the rogue code. A couple of suggestions and helpful resources I’ve found to date are:

For image optimization/compression:

ImageOptim – offering a downloadable MAC version as well as a WEB version and supports JPEG, SVG, anim GIF, and PNG.
Compressor – 4 file formats supported – JPEG, PNG, GIF, SVG.
Compress JPEG – Supports JPEG, PNG, PDF’s.
HTML Compressor – which I’ve just discovered and will get back to you on its effectiveness.

Long story short, the Cow Pasture with much love and attention, is healing. However, should you encounter a post with a missing picture or other, please be patient – WordPress and I are working on the problem.

I recommend should discover the same code in your posts, please notify WordPress support. Additionally, if you have experienced something similar or have answers or suggestions, please let know.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject. Join the conversation. Talk to me or tell me your story. I’m all ears.