Call Me Florence

The Daily Post Prompt:  Ballerina Fireman Astronaut Movie Star
When you were 10, what did you want to be when you grew up? What are you now? Are the two connected?

I don’t remember much about the age of ten. For sure, I wasn’t focused on a career. Growing up in a small town, I spent my days as a child playing outside with my sisters and brother or a friend. If anything, I thought about becoming a wife and mother.

The one thing I do remember wanting to be when I grew up was,  a non-smoker. Having grown up in a smoking household, I hated the smell of smoke and the stench that permeated every surface. At the young age of nine, I made the conscious decision to set a different and healthier path for myself. I would never smoke. It was the first step toward my career and realizing what I really wanted to be when I grew up – Florence Nightingale.

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images-8Florence Nightingale surfaced while I was holding court with three preteen boys in the basement of their home. Our parents, long time friends, were upstairs visiting. Why I came along for the visit, escapes me now.

Bored, I perched up on top of the washing machine as if I owned the world, and the boys gathered round. A precocious adolescent, developing ahead of most of my friends, I’d learned years ago my blonde hair and green eyes were an asset. A subtle flip of hair or intent gaze seemed to work magic.

All three boys stood around the washer, looking goo-goo eyed. Elbows propped on the edge and baby-fuzzed faces cupped in fidgety hands, they couldn’t take their eyes off me as I regaled them with stories of becoming a missionary nurse and traveling the world to help the sick and infirmed.

Of course, I could’ve been speaking jibberish for all they cared; adolescent boys will believe anything given the circumstances. I loved the attention using every bit of my wily teenage charm on those six sets of adoring eyes.

I’m guessing, based on the oldest boy’s level of attention, his mom spent a busy day laundering sheets the next day. Just saying, I could be pretty disarming for a young lady. And, when you’re fifteen, unmitigated adoration goes a long way feeding that demon.

I grew up in a small southern town. The middle child of three girls, and a younger brother. Two half sisters came later when Mom remarried. Maturing ahead of most of my classmates, I learned early on, when a boy in my class bumped into me, boobs created a lot of attention. He  pointed at my well-developed chest and yelled for the whole class to hear, “She’s got them things.” A smart girl, I caught on fast; discovering that  my assets, while unwelcome at first, had advantages.

He and his friends followed me around the playground for weeks until I had enough and reported them to the teacher. Attention, although nice  could also be tiresome. It would be on my terms or not at all.

Over the years, more than those three young boys, hanging onto the side of the washer and my every word, would accuse me of sending double-whammies with my green eyes, but I digress.

As usual, when you make broad declarations at the age of fifteen, they rarely come true; mine were no exception, at least, not in the strictest sense. I didn’t do the missionary thing, not the way you think, but in 1972, Florence Nightingale followed me to nursing school.

The satellite branch of the University of South Carolina, less than an hour’s drive from home, offered the closest associate degree nursing program.  With four younger kids left at home, there would be no dorm room or college campus experience for me; I’d have to commute. I didn’t mind. Contrary to my precocious adolescence, Florence and I weren’t the partying kind.

One of the first assignments I received in nursing school included keeping a personal journal to record why we chose nursing and our experiences during the first semester. Yadda, yadda, yadda. The assignment sounded juvenile to me, more like high school than college. But, to the professors, the journals were serious business, counting a third of our grade. If that’s what they wanted, that’s what they’d get, with a bit of a twist.

From day one, I signed my journal Florence Nightingale. Of course, identifying myself, on the inside cover, to get credit where credit was due. Every entry went under the name of Florence, and my professor’s reaction? Oh, my God, she loved it.  She and Florence had quite the rapport going the whole semester. Based on her graded comments to each entry, you would have thought she was communicating with the dead.

Now, don’t get me wrong. A good student, I studied. While others played hearts in the canteen area, I hit the books. By the end of my first semester of nursing school, I’d learned more than the funny language of medicine or how to stick the butt of an orange (nothing exciting). In fact, my “assets” paled in comparison to what the journal and Florence taught me. I’d discovered the art of bullshit and spin; the power of words.

No doubt, I had big plans. I’d be the next Florence Nightingale, work to help cure cancer, or the next disease threatening to wipe out humanity, and I swear to God, I think my professors believed it too, but then, that might just be me. First semester – I earned an A.

I’d love to hear your comments. Talk to me. Tell me your story. And as always, you can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood, PinterestBloglovinTwitter@sheilagood, and Contently.

Where There’s a Will, There’s A Way

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Helpless.”

I detest feeling helpless. You know the sense of “What now?” I consider myself a strong and independent woman. My philosophy has always been, “Where there’s a will there’s a way.” (Just ask my kids). But, like anything, a time comes when you realize, life and the world are not in your control. Shit happens and sometimes, you can do about it, but sit back and watch.  

During my divorce, many years ago, I was determined to buy, set up, and decorate a Christmas tree for my two beautiful daughters. Easy peasy, what was the big deal? When we purchased our tree, the girls’ excitement became infectious.  Thankfully the man placed it on top of the car for me. With great effort, we managed to get the tree to the front porch.

A little tall for the apartment, I retrieved the flimsy handsaw I’d bought along with the tree stand, and proceeded to saw on the bottom of the ragged trunk.

Honest to God, I was certain my arms would fall off before the tree trunk. My heavy breathing and blood-red face sent my oldest daughter into a fit of the giggles and then, into song. She began dancing around the porch and singing as loud as she could, “Mama needs a man…”

Between taking breaths, I vehemently denied it and kept sawing, praying silently God would drop one (a man) out of the sky. I am still convinced the trunk contained lead.

He didn’t drop one from the sky, but my neighbor, a tall, strapping man arrived home from work just in the nick of time. He took one look at me, walked over, and in two stokes the ragged trunk dropped to the floor (due to all my efforts of course). He carried it into our apartment, and secured it in the stand. I thanked him, “I almost had it, you know.” I can still see the smile on his face.

The feeling of helplessness grows with aging. I’ve experienced a number of those occasions. But, I always try to remember what I’ve drummed into my kids heads all their lives.”  Where there’s a will, there’s a way.” I can do it.

As always, I’d love to hear your comments. Talk to me. Tell me your story. And as always, you can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood and  Twitter @cofcmom.

A Tribute to Daddy

“Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.” Exodus 20:12

Today is Father’s Day and all over the country, families will celebrate with cards, gifts, phone calls and gatherings. For many, however, there is no father. Some have never known theirs; others see him infrequently, through bars, or lost him too soon.

I was five years old when I lost my father to a brain aneurysm; he was 32 years old. Although, I don’t have many memories of my childhood, I do have  memories of my daddy.466eb47d-5dd4-493b-a892-e29e20917249 I remember laughter, a tight-knit family, and a sense of security. My daddy had a fun, mischievous side to him and he loved us.

A memory I will always cherish is the Sunday me and my two sisters misbehaved in church, or so mom said. We were warned, “You just wait until your father gets home.” Daddy closed the door to our bedroom, removed his belt and told us, “Girls, when I hit the bed I want you to cry real loud.” He gave that bed the spanking of a lifetime and satisfied mom’s demand we be punished. Our suppressed giggles and the smile on my daddy’s face will stay with me always.

I also remember the day he got sick and the last time I saw him in his hospital bed, just before surgery. Alert and smiling, he hugged and kissed each one of us. He told us he loved us and to be good to mama. Daddy died on the operating room table before the surgery began. I remember my cousin lifting me over the casket, sitting in our family living room, to kiss him goodbye. Losing him was a tremendous loss, but it would be years before I realized the magnitude.

Recently, I reconnected with some of my cousins on daddy’s side and we visited my 93-year-old Aunt, daddy’s only remaining sibling. With a crystal clear mind, she shared stories with me. She validated those early memories and gave me a few new ones to cherish. My aunt told me, he was a good man and “crazy about your mama and all of you kids.” It is something I knew deep in my heart even as a child.

WashingDaddysCar

Daddy, I honor you today for the father you were to me, my sisters, and brother. I did not have you long, but you left a lasting impression on the woman I have become. Thank you for the image of making mom laugh. Thank you for the Sunday’s at Grandma’s and always stopping by the State line store to spend the silver dollar Papa gave to each of us. I remember what you always said as you pulled to a stop in front of the store, “I bet that money’s burning a hole in your pocket.” Thanks Daddy for letting me help you wash your car, play in the snow and not spanking me for getting in the hen-house. Thank you for the memories of love, Daddy and showing me, once upon a time the true meaning of family. .

Happy Father’s Day,

I love you

You can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood and  Twitter @cofcmom.

Day 4

Day 4

Put Discipline into Your Daily Writing Schedule

As many of you know, if you read my post, Are Squirrels Interfering With Your Writing Routine?  It is difficult for me to stick to a daily writing schedule. I won’t rehash the reasons (you can see some of them in the post). Suffice it to say, some days I’m disciplined, other days I’m like a thirteen year old girl with her mind on everything but her homework. And don’t get me started on how a retired husband fits into the equation.

So, in an attempt to become more disciplined and inspired by my sister, Jean Cogdell @jeans writing, I’ve decided to participate in Jeff Goins 500 Words 31Day Challenge. The challenge started yesterday and I wrote a  story, Maggie’s New Beginning (Check it out) the (terribleminds)  Flash Fiction Challenge (Chuck Wendig).

Day 2

I’m announcing so you and the other participants can help keep me honest and on track. Feel free to give me a nudge. The fun part of this challenge is there’s no theme. The purpose is to help you become disciplined to write at least 500 words a day. Some days, I will share writing tips and resources. Other days, I’ll share excerpts from my work in progress or a flash fiction piece.

For those interested in participating, here are the rules:

  • Write 500 words per day, every day for 31 days.
  • You can write more if you want, but 500 words is the minimum.
  • Don’t edit. Just write.
  • If you miss a day, pick up where you left off. Don’t make up for lost days.
  • Encourage, don’t criticize (unless explicitly invited to do so).
  • Blogging counts, but email does not.
  • All of this is completely free.

I gotta say, the “don’t edit” rule kinda makes me nervous. So expect to see an errant comma or two (I’m a bit of a comma whore) or a few passive sentences.  I’m also a was whore as I tend to write as I talk; although, those who know me would never call me passive (ask them). Whatever I share I hope you will  be kind in your comments and please do comment. I love feedback, even when it hurts.

How to be Successful in keeping a Daily Schedule

1. Set your alarm and get up an hour earlier. If you’re like me, you won’t need an alarm clock. I’m up every day before 6 am.

2. Set aside uninterrupted time to write. For me, that’s those early morning hours. Once my husband’s feet hit the floor, all bets are off. Which brings me to the next suggestion.

3. Tell your family (retired husbands included) the time frame you are not to be disturbed. If a large chunk of time is too difficult, set aside increments of time. For some, you may need to place a do not disturb sign on your door, send your kids to Grandmas or locking them out of the house (make sure they have plenty of water, it’s hot as Hades). As for the husband, can’t help you too much, keeping mine occupied is all I can handle.

4. Plan for the next day.

5. Spend at least a portion of your time brainstorming for topics.

I’ll leave you with this quote of inspiration:

“If you only write when inspired, you may be a fairly decent poet, but you’ll never be a novelist.” Neil Gaiman

Do you have a daily writing schedule? How do you do it? I’d love to hear from you. You can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood and  Twitter @cofcmom

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