Why Do You Write?

June 27, 2015October 21, 2016 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / Leave a comment

Day 10

Day 10 of the My 500 Words Challenge! Write about writing. What do you love about the craft? What do you hate? What are you struggling with, when it comes to this challenge?

If you read my post from Day 5, Cow Pasture Chronicles, My Oasis, you already know when I began putting pen to paper. As a young it was more about finding my voice in a crowed and loud home. When you’re surrounded by so many others, a listening and understanding ear is hard to find. Writing became an escape and gave me the satisfaction that someone was listening, even if they were the four-legged kind.

When I began college, an English Professor, Nancy Moore thought my writing was exceptional and encouraged me to major in English. Of course with her high praise, she became a favorite of mine. I’m amazed I remember her name. An English major lasted a year before I changed it to Nursing, but my love of writing and words continued to grow. My mother planted that seed a long time ago with her love of books; reading was a family affair.

Which brings me to why I love the craft. It’s the stories, plain and simple. To me there is nothing so intriguing and exciting as a story which transports you to the page. Or, as I did the other day at the gym, exclaim out loud, “OMG.” In case you’re curious, I’m reading Stephen King’s, A Good Marriage. It’s the stories of our lives, the people, places, things, and events we experience along the way that give us our stories. Writing, like no other craft, sets the imagination free with no boundaries. Okay, maybe a few.

Which brings me to what I hate about the craft. Rules and competition top my list. The rules of grammar are stifling sometimes. I know, many of you will throw your hands to your chest in shock, “You must follow the rules. By the way, watch out for weak words and passive sentences. Show, don’t tell. Make your opening sentence, paragraph dynamite. Check pacing and sentence length, and without conflict and rising stakes, and without the proper structure, it won’t work.

Now, before y’all (southern slang) started scolding me in print, let me say, “I understand the need for rules, some of them, but when your focus becomes micromanaging every sentence, you lose the ability to let the story flow. Instead, it can feel like labor, a long, arduous labor.

I’ve always believed competition a good thing; regardless of the enterprise or the craft. But, with a zillion people on the internet and probably as many blogs, being heard becomes a game of chance as much as skill. A chance that a blog post will go viral, the right person with the right connections likes what she read and passes you on to others. Contests are a whole other type of competition. With thousands of entries, getting your story to stand out, becomes like a needle in a haystack. Yeah, yeah, I hear you – “If the story is good enough, it’ll stand out. Maybe, hopefully, or perhaps, the screening reader doesn’t like your genre, or plot line. Not that it wasn’t well written, but that kind of story ain’t her cup of tea.” Submitting work is challenging, time-consuming, and the rewards, few and far between.

What am I struggling with, related to this challenge? Time, plain and simple. I’m somewhat of a perfectionist and I didn’t like missing Day 8, but the one thing I’ve learned since I began writing (and it’s difficult), is to recognize when I need a break, to stop pushing, and take time to relax, and let my mind wander the fields of words and imagination.

Thanks Jeff, for the challenge and todays prompt.

Tell me what you think. Tell me your story. I’d love to hear from you. And as always, you can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood and Twitter @cofcmom.

How to Be Your Own Health Care Advocate

June 27, 2015October 21, 2016 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / Leave a comment

I know I missed day 8 was a bit under the weather; my bad.

Day 9

Here is Day 9 of the My 500 Words Challenge! Our words carry weight. They can inspire and motivate others. Or they can teach us a thing or two. Today, use your words to educate others.

In my previous life I was a nurse. I can tell you the view from the other side of that profession is a daunting and sometimes frustrating experience. Particularly with all the changes in the health care system. When I began my nursing career, a patient care decisions were between the patient and the doctor.

Visits lasted longer than ten minutes. The physician genuinely seemed concerned and was eager to answer questions. Wake up sick, an appointment was usually available. Now, you’re lucky if you can get in to see your family physician within two months. Acutely, ill? The standard response is, “Go to the emergency room or your nearest urgent care center.” And, if you’re ill enough for hospital admission, it won’t be your physician who comes to see you or follow your care – nope it will be a Hospitalist!

Hospitalist may be very qualified, however, they are NOT, my physician. They don’t know my history. Of course, they can pull my records up in the new electronic medical record system, but they don’t know me. I am more than the computerized template of information and checklist. Talk about loss of continuity of care!

I have an autoimmune disease with chronic complications. There was a time I could call one of my physicians and discuss my health. He/she respected my opinion and when I disagreed with the treatment plan, was willing to talk. That has become a thing of the past.

In order to maintain control over my own care, I developed a system. After all, this is the only body I’m gonna have and I deserve not only to be heard, but to make sure my physicians are up to date.

In addition, every frigging time I go for a follow-up, labs, or other outpatient procedure, I’m required to answer the same damn questions and fill out the same stupid forms.

List all physicians seen since your last visit.

List all medications and allergies

List history of surgeries

When was the last time you had a mammogram, colonoscopy, blah, blah, blah.

I can’t remember what I did yesterday much less what I did last year, or longer. If you want to be informed and an active member of your healthcare team, I have a few recommendations.

Always take another person with you, especially if you’re facing tests results, potential bad news, or have a chronic or complicated history.
Maintain a universal medication sheet with immunizations, and allergies and carry a copy of it with you.
Make a list of all physicians, include the practice name, address, phone number, and fax number.
Universal Medication Form
Keep a list of previous surgeries, hospital admissions, and the year.
Keep a list of significant outpatient procedures: mammogram, bone density, colonoscopy, and other preventive procedures.
Request and keep a copy every test ordered for you; labs, x-rays, cat scan, MRI’s, etc. These are not routinely offered, but all you have to do is request a copy. I’ve provided easy to use forms, feel free to download. Here’s to health.
CLICK TO DOWNLOAD

CLICK TO DOWNLOAD

I’d love to hear from you. Talk to me, tell me your story. And, as always, you can follow me on Facebook at SheilaMGood and Twitter @cofcmom.

Tsunami of Silence – Aftershocks

June 26, 2015October 21, 2016 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / Leave a comment

Five Sentence Fiction – Waves

“It’s always the squeaky wheel that gets noticed.”

“Jesus, be quiet. Someone might overhear us.”

“So? I have the right to voice an opinion, just like the next person.”

“Not anymore; I don’t like it either, but I ain’t gonna make waves.”

“Yeah, I can see that; I just hope you can swim.”

The Downward Trajectory of Life- How Not to Feel Irrelevant

June 24, 2015October 21, 2016 / Sheila McIntrye Good, Author / 4 Comments

Thanks Jeff for the prompt. This free-writing exercise for day 7 of my500words, brought out a bit of melancholy.

Photo courtesy of Google & feministcurrent.com

I wished someone had told me, five, ten, or twenty years ago how hard things get when you begin the downward trajectory of life. I will turn 62 in November and in terms of the average life span in the US, 62 is still young.

However, no one prepared me for becoming irrelevant. What I mean is, as we approach this time in our lives, our children are adults, many into mid-life and the grandchildren seem to be maturing faster than the weeds in my garden.

The children you once spoke to daily or weekly are now caught up in their own immediate families. Their schedules packed running one child to dance, the other to sports practice.

While they used to run situations or decisions by you, they no longer need to, having gained a fair amount of life experiences themselves. Now, they are the parent comforting, or giving out advice to a child. Problems once seemed only insurmountable if discussed with mom are now handled with a mature and steady mind.

As a parent, on the one hand, I’m thrilled they can do it themselves. After all, that’s what all the years of parenting were for, making them independent, strong individuals capable of dealing with the ups and downs of life. On the other hand, I miss being needed.

It’s not as if they don’t want my advice (Ok, maybe sometimes), but they don’t need it. I’ve done my job. All that’s left is to sit back and relax. If only it was that easy.

Day 7

Growing old can be very lonely. So, here are a few things I wished I’d known and even though, no one is asking, a little advice. Take it or leave it, but I hope you will at least consider it for the times ahead.

Cultivate a hobby, something you enjoy early on. It will keep your hands and mind busy when the days become longer.
Cultivate friends, many of them, paying special attention to those most loyal.
“Do for others as you would have them do unto you.” It isn’t just a Bible verse; it is a way of life and when honored will reap many rewards.
Be kind, but genuine. In this hectic world where everyone seems to wear their feelings on their sleeves, it is often difficult to stay the course when the road of values divide.
Learn to disagree, agreeably – silence and acquiescence will smother you as quickly as a soft pillow pressed upon your face. There is nothing worse than a disagreeable old person.
Give more than you take in relationships, time, and money. The benefits far out weigh dividends.
Learn to listen. Sometimes, all anyone needs is an ear.
Stay informed don’t lose your voice, it matters.
Stay active and honor your body. The years ahead will present challenges and the better prepared your body is; the better you will weather the storm.
Remember your father and mother. Check on them, call them, and ask the questions you want to ask now. There will come a time, when the answers are lost.

As a nurse, I understood the cycle of life. Much like the 3 act structure in a novel, we are born, live, and die. The second act is where all the exciting things happen. The third act of life brings resolution. Make it exciting all the way to end and have no regrets.