Do you ever find yourself wondering what people are thinking when they leave rambling messages on your voice mail? Do you ever make a smart comment about it? I can remember saying as I listened to Cynthia sometimes “For the love of God!”. I would tell her “You ramble on and on….”. I wish I could hear her rambling messages. Usually, I erased them before completely listening to them, because I was already dialing her number. I can’t sleep. She has been on my mind all day and now I’m laying in bed remembering all of those rambling phone messages she always left on my phone! Sometimes it was several because she couldn’t locate me, immediately. “Sheila, Where the hell are you, when I need you?” Why aren’t you answering your phone?”. ” You would not believe the day I’ve had!” “Call me, damn it!”. Sometimes she would be crying, distraught over some crisis or sisterly dispute or some perceived wrong and just wanted to vent. “Sheila, call me, I need you”. In those instances, the messages would go on until the tape nearly ran out. She could never just say “Give a call”; that would have been too simple. Sometimes she would call laughing out loud ” you are not going to believe this! I have the funniest thing to tell you! Call me!” I could never not call her back as fast as I could. She was just one of those essential people that required my immediate attention. She was important in my life. I looked forward to hers calls even when they rambled. I am wishing I had hadn’t erased her last message; it was a long one, quite funny. I just want to hear her voice, talking to me. I have a voice message , on my cell phone, she left her son, that I listen to but it’s not the same, it’s his; I feel like I’m eavesdropping. She’s not talking to me. But at least I still get to hear the sound of her voice. I am afraid of forgetting that sound. Damn it Cynthia, where the hell are you when I need you? Call me , damn it!